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Utah Jazz vs. Minnesota Timberwolves: Opponent Game Thread Highlights

March 2, 2017
tags: ,

Today’s Opponent Game Thread host: Canis Hoopus.

“Los Wolves” on the shooting shirts tonight…
Guess the whole “Los Lobos” thing is trademarked, huh??

Posted by SoDakHammer on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:02 PM

Either that or an executive order banning words of foreign provenance.
Posted by uncle rico on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:04 PM

But, but…he was soooooooooooo “presidential” last night???
An anorexic flatworm couldn’t limbo under that kind of low bar…

Posted by SoDakHammer on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:06 PM

My professor asked for headshots from all of his grad students so he can remember our names better
that’s like the weirdest request I’ve seen from a teacher yet.

Posted by Joel Hernandez on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:07 PM

You should do a prison mug shot photo shoot
Even better if you already have an authentic mug shot!

Posted by Name-Game on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:09 PM

I had two professors do that in undergrad (they were married)
The wife took a video of each us introducing ourselves. It felt like those “I’m a Mormon commercial from a few years ago.”

Posted by running with Twolves (and scissors) on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:19 PM

Did you do it with a sweet mustache?
Posted by Joel Hernandez on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:21 PM

No, but I did show up to the class sweaty and out of breath most of the time.
It was after I would play basketball everyday and I was married so I didn’t bother showering.

Posted by running with Twolves (and scissors) on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:23 PM

Which wife, running? Wait, am I conflating the Valentine’s Day joke with tonight’s opponent’s religious affiliation?
Posted by uncle rico on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:25 PM

We should all analyze why Wiggins didn’t pass it to Ricky there
I think it’s cause he hates spanish people

Posted by Joel Hernandez on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:13 PM


Rush hit a three!
Did everyone witness?

Posted by Name-Game on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:18 PM

Rush is playing?
Posted by Logical Dodo on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:20 PM

Depends on the definition
Of playing

Posted by Name-Game on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:21 PM

Thought he was out of the NBA
Haven’t seen him in forever. Thought he retired.

Posted by Logical Dodo on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:22 PM

Kiss Cam must be tough for the Mormons. Which wife to kiss?
Posted by uncle rico on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:28 PM

My boss is Mormon.
Only one wife, but 6 kids.

Posted by Mnem on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:29 PM

Underachiever
Posted by Asleep at the Keyboard on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:31 PM

In Utah, they refer to him as a “bachelor”
Posted by uncle rico on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:32 PM

And that’s just family #1
Family 2 and 3 on the other hand…

Posted by Logical Dodo on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:32 PM


Has the shipment arrived yet, AJ?
I thought I saw a FedEx truck circling your neighborhood this afternonn.

Posted by Asleep at the Keyboard on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:33 PM

If you are talking about the box of rats
it’s in the back yard because we didn’t want to deal with it tonight and the idea of someone stealing our package only to find out it’s frozen rats is too funny so we don’t worry about risk of theft.

Posted by AverageJer on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:40 PM

Brandon Rush’s inability to hit a wide fucking open 3 is
frustrating

Posted by Poop Hat on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:32 PM

Seriously though
Mormons are awesome people. Not very often a religion is stereotyped as “nice”

Posted by Logical Dodo on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:37 PM

Favors is pretty good
Posted by Joel Hernandez on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:43 PM

Joe flipping Engles!
MPE for three years running.

Posted by Asleep at the Keyboard on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:44 PM

All while moonlighting at HnR Block during tax season, too.
Posted by uncle rico on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:46 PM

He just wants the opportunity to have a Christmas party at work
Posted by Joel Hernandez on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:49 PM

He probably takes a full advantage
Of the open bar.

Posted by Name-Game on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:50 PM


Stupid Gobert
Ruining an awesome Rubio assist

Posted by Name-Game on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:48 PM

If Dunn can get on the same level of overall play that Rubio & Tyus are currently at, would the Timberwolves have the best trio of points in the NBA?
Posted by The.Purple.Bizon on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:55 PM

Not sure, but I’m salivating at all of the possible nicknames
The Three Amigos
The Three Musketeers
etc
Until then it’s just: Paul, John and Ringo

Posted by Logical Dodo on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:56 PM

Tres Hombres
Posted by SoDakHammer on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:58 PM

That would just get them deported.
Posted by uncle rico on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:02 PM

only if they’re bad hombres
Posted by Mattsteg on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:02 PM

Then we could tie it in with our three forwards, Jordan Hill, Adreian Payne, and Brandon Rush.
The Three Stooges.

Posted by therealfracas on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:58 PM

The Three A-Please-Gos
Posted by SoDakHammer on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:00 PM

So close to me and my coworkers nickname on the street
“The Three A-Pleasing-Hos”

Posted by Logical Dodo on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:02 PM

three hos a-pleasing
like the 12 days of christmas?

Posted by Mattsteg on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:03 PM

Naughty Version (of course)
Next part is: “Two dudes releasing”

Posted by Logical Dodo on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:04 PM

Gawd, I don’t wanna know what’s in the pear tree!!!
Posted by SoDakHammer on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:04 PM


I was just watching Suns highlights the other night and Diaw was actually in shape.
Posted by Mnem on Mar 1, 2017 | 8:57 PM

Wolves defense has been awesome tonight
So good to see

Posted by Name-Game on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:02 PM

1st half
Mighty quiet in that arena…

Posted by mefoolonhill on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:09 PM

I think it’s always that way. No caffeine. 3.2 beer. Makes sense.
Posted by uncle rico on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:12 PM

Rudy just chilling near 4 wolves waiting for the putback dunk
Posted by Joel Hernandez on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:29 PM

Rush is a trainwreck way too often
Posted by Doctor_Teh on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:30 PM

He has D- athleticism.
Posted by Captain Teeb’s Hotels on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:35 PM

bizarre game
but I am totally happy with the apparent W

Posted by Poop Hat on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:36 PM

Utah reached 50 points
It feel wierd isnt in the 1st quarter

Posted by CarlosAntonioPueblos on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:39 PM

A fun thing to do for Jazz games is to play Where’s Waldo with the crowd, but for black people.*
*this is true of most NBA games

Posted by Catalinawinemixer on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:41 PM


Jazz fans booing their playoff team
Hmmm

Posted by Name-Game on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:41 PM

3.2 beer finally kicking in
Tolerance be damned.

Posted by uncle rico on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:44 PM

I would have booked the entire 4th quarter.
Total garbage effort from Utah.

Posted by Ray Williams? on Mar 1, 2017 | 10:15 PM

Jazz unraveling a bit right now
Posted by Doctor_Teh on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:41 PM

Drive by comment
Wolves holding a decent team to 53 points in 3 quarters may be my favorite part of this season to date.

Posted by Klawitter on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:44 PM

Can we win this game without scoring another point?
Posted by Joel Hernandez on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:46 PM

The numbers on my TV seem to be inverted.
Posted by AverageJer on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:51 PM

Fake scores
Posted by uncle rico on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:54 PM

*alternative
Posted by CarlosAntonioPueblos on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:55 PM

How appropriate is it
that their dance team is sponsored by “America First”?

Posted by Mattsteg on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:56 PM


Quinn Snyder is terrifying
Posted by Name-Game on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:57 PM

Ingles is my NBA comp
Posted by running with Twolves (and scissors) on Mar 1, 2017 | 10:08 PM

Thoughts and prayers to the victims of the Salt Lake City Massacre
Posted by E-6 on Mar 1, 2017 | 9:59 PM

Terrorized by Wolves;
a Mormon’s tale of woe.

Posted by Asleep at the Keyboard on Mar 1, 2017 | 10:03 PM

Can’t remember the last time I saw a team leaving this big a turd on the court other than the Wolves.
Posted by Ray Williams? on Mar 1, 2017 | 10:11 PM

how do they have that good of a record??? sheesh… the Jazz looked HORRIBLE lol
Posted by blackmankitteh on Mar 1, 2017 | 10:15 PM

We’ve got 2 days off before playing those sad-sack Spurs
Posted by Rodman99 on Mar 1, 2017 | 10:43 PM

Easy win
Posted by Logical Dodo on Mar 1, 2017 | 10:44 PM

at this point why not
Posted by VoodooMagic on Mar 1, 2017 | 10:51 PM

Your optimism is showing <3
Posted by Logical Dodo on Mar 1, 2017 | 10:54 PM

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