Utah Jazz Season Recap Haiku
New/old logo, new/old floor
Knicks pick on the way
Jeremy Evans–um, who?
Summer League sheds light
Don’t let the door hit you Booz
Ronnie B joins them
Wesley Matthews offer sheet
Die Portland Die. Die!
This bears repeating
So angry I can’t think straight
Die Portland Die. Die!
Impresses with his earrings,
sweat, and attitude…
No more Boom Bitches
The Koof, we barely knew ya
But, Hallelujah!
Raja’s back! And then
it’s time for the induction
of my beloved
Mailman, into the
Naismith Hall of Fame. Looking
damn good in a tux
sei Elson. Had no clue how
I’d grow to love them
AK for Boris Diaw????
#%@%#$^%%$&^$%&^^%^&%*&%^
‘Melo Anthony
What a freaking little bitch
Make up your damn mind
AK’s back. Desperately
in need of haircut…
…but back. No words can
describe my relief and joy
Now, ’bout the mohawk…
Did we know what we’re in for?
Season of fry sauce,
Heads on sticks…starting
to think that “signage” is a
real word. Jazz Nation!
Fes finger wag and rim-blocked
We’re undefeated!
kicks off with a whimper and
ball-hurling drama
ami! 4-0 East Coast trip!
Things are looking up!
…If you believed that
Hahaha, the joke’s on you
Icepick wars could help?
Discernibly rhythmless
Wailing Jazz fan blues
Mixed, matched into oblivion
Thy name is/was SWARM
It’s game after game
of early double digit
opponent leads. Frick.
Jazz Nation thinking:
Will we ever win again?
Freefall to hoops hell
of losing’s only broken
by Hayward’s hickey
And ‘ere I forget
Al falling on his butt-ox
Mem’rable moments
won’t show up on highlight reels
Getting all up in
J.R. Smith’s business
While Raja looks on smirking
Captain my captain
Utah Jazz vs. Jazz East
Disaster looming…
“Visibly shaken”
Jerry’s post-game is delayed
Announcement coming
Tears: He cried, I cried
It can’t be true. The Jazz will
never be the same
unbelievable function
Let the truth bombs fly
“I know my coach.” “My
coach never quit anything.”
Jerry and Phil, gone
No time to process; Devin
and Derrick are here
The crowd screams in ecstasy
Ty gets his first win
goes for 40, then turns back
into his old self
Memo is shut down
Ronnie P’s foot is aching
AK hurt again
drama this season? Guess not…
Heeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrreeee’s Brian T. Smith!
Al Jefferson is
so the devil incarnate
Must convince the world
Resident Laker killer
in the house. G-Time!
Roller coaster ride over
It is what it is
’cause Favors is the Future
AK please be back
Completely epic
You have a gift for color
Jazz commentary.
Haha, I loved this. I feel inspired to finish my jazz rap I began twelve months ago
can i just tell you how cool it is that you commented in haiku? lol
re your rap–please do it do it do it! (once your finals are over)
Good job! I feel as tough writing this have been emotionally taxing, well done.
By the way, I love it!
Thank you, Jazzy Girl!