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Game 71 vs. BOS: Big Turkey FTW

March 23, 2010
It’s raining money, and Kyle is celebrating!

First half: In the officials’ eyes, no front court has ever fouled so much or been as inept as the Jazz’s front court of Memo, Boozer, Sap, and the Koof (recalled and filling in for a stomach virus-stricken Fes). The Jazz also can’t hit a 3 to save their lives, which does not bode well for our chances of winning. Also, the Celtics are distracting me with all of their different colored shoes.

Halftime: Does the NBA want to avoid “retribution calls against Sloan” theories, or assert its absolute power over players and coaches? They appear to be going with the latter tonight.

3rd Quarter: Memo hits a 3. Whew. (whistles) And another. Woohoo! (more whistles) AND AGAIN!! IT’S RAINING MONEY!! (The refs making me want to shove their whistles down their throats on both ends. Freaking just let them play.)

4th Quarter: Don’t lose the lead…Memo is crashing the boards like he’s Karl Malone…don’t lose the lead…Boozer with the block/steal and a Memo-speed dunk!…don’t lose the lead….Doc gets thrown out with one minute left. He sarcastically applauds the refs; I applaud him. 51 freaking fouls tonight (+Doc’s 2). Game. Cue encore of “Oh happy day…”

P.S. Why was Scola in SLC and disguised as an ESA usher?

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