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Supersized Salmagundi Season Wrapup

May 19, 2008
Everyone wants a piece of Dwill: Dfish, Kobe, Gasol, the film crews, the photogs…(from jazzcrap.com)

FB [purposely] fouls out and the Jazz immediately get back into the game.

ESPN says: Carlos Boozer says:
“I think I had a phenomenal year…As a leader of this team and a cornerstone of this team, I feel like I let my teammates down by not making shots. But at the same time, I’m going to learn from it. I’ll move on and be better next year…Shots didn’t go in, got a couple calls called against me, didn’t finish a couple plays that I’ve been finishing all my life, but that’s part of basketball.”

So in summary: it was the refs’ and fate’s fault that he sucked. And phenomenal, leader, and cornerstone my big fat ass.

—————————-
And now to the collection of random thoughts in this mindless person’s head:

0. First and foremost: Lakers fans in the Delta Center (aka ESA) make me want to throw up.

1. Now that Memo has transformed into a serviceable (great?) rebounder, and especially a serviceable (great?) offensive rebounder, AK should be moved to the 4 and FB should be traded for a wing player that is capable of 40-point nites. The only hitch in this awesome plan is, what team would agree to this trade? That is, besides Memphis, since they already gave Gasol away.

1a. For those advocating that FB be traded/benched in favor of Sap: No(t yet). Sap is a good hustle player but he is still so raw and foul-prone. Part of that may be that he doesn’t have the respect of the refs (again, yet), but I don’t know if he will ever be the answer.

1b. For those advocating an AK/Okur/Boozer trade: There are only, at most, 2-3 AK-esque [stat filling] and Memo-esque [C's that shoot 3's] players in the league. There must be, however, a good 20 Boozers in the league. And I bet most of them know how to play D. And incidentally, imagine the Jazz defense without AK. Nightmare.

1c. Fess is not yet the answer to our woes. If he were, he would have torn up the D-League. He didn’t.

2. I would LOVE for Boozer to be left off the Olympic roster after his play in the past two months. Maybe that’ll get through to him. However, [K]Shuhshefsky, aka FB’s college coach that failed to teach him defense, is the Olympics coach which would seem to indicate FB has an unfair advantage over his competition. On the other hand, if he plays well, maybe it’ll raise his trade value. The situation bears watching.

3. Gasol has very feminine mannerisms.

4. Thanks ESPN commentators. I really wanted to know what Vujacic’s hair-styling regimen is.

5. Carlos Boozer, I want the last seven months of my life back.

6. I hated how my heart started beating wildly when the Jazz went on the mid-4th run and the Lakers called TO. I wanted to stay distant and removed. I couldn’t.

7. When I noticed that the Lakers were in the penalty and the Jazz had 0 fouls with over 5 minutes remaining in the 4th, my first thought was that Stern was pulling the strings again and ensuring a Game 7 for more TV and ad revenue. Of course, this notion quickly died out as the Jazz were called for three in one minute and the next eight. That’s right. EIGHT.* In the refs’ eyes, the Lakers did not commit a single foul in the last 5:16 of the game.

*To disclose all relevant information, the last couple were to stop the clock. But still. Eight fouls in a row on the Jazz.

8. It absolutely KILLS me when FB plays like crap and once in a game or every two games, he’ll show an absolutely beautiful post move, working himself into the paint and practically gliding to the hoop. It shows how good he could be if he cared, had heart, weren’t so lazy…

9. As usual, when he fouled out, that little spark of hope lit up inside me that the Jazz now had a chance.

10. I wasn’t wrong about #9. As soon as FB went to the bench, the Jazz went on a 19-12 run, including 5 straight 3′s. Meanwhile, the Lakers’ final ten points all came courtesy of Stern. I mean the refs. I mean at the FT line. I mean Stern.

11. The “new John Stockton and Karl Malone” comparisons must stop. The “new John Stockton” comparisons can continue, but the “new John Stockton AND Karl Malone” comparisons must stop.

12. At the end of the game: when I heard the crowd give the J a standing O, I got a bit choked up and my heart hurt (and that was on the audio alone since I was at work). Can’t wait to DL the game and watch the last four minutes minus the last 10 seconds.

13. Hot Rod immediately after the game: “The rally came when Boozer fouled out. Another bad game.” Like a previous post said, if even LHM employees are admitting there’s a problem, there is a massive problem.

14. And then nba.com cut the feed 3 minutes after the game ended. Why couldn’t you have let me have access to the last minutes of the season? Why? WHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?

15. I now need the Spurs to first beat NO so that everyone can stop kissing CP3′s ass, and then beat the Lakers for revenge. I don’t care who wins in the end.
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One Comment leave one →
  1. NESE permalink
    May 20, 2008 12:55 pm

    FIRST B*TCHES

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